The one night many of friends remember as a joke is the night that I saw my own fragility. I had the note in my pocket explaining my reasons for my decision. I had not learned to embrace my sexuality and my strong human longing for answers. The answer was easy, drink until I died. Waking up the next morning disappointed because of my own weakness to accomplish anything even this. Like a sick twist I woke up to the news of a friends death. I haven't been able to truly face my family, friends or myself since then. Sadly it was not my last attempt. Now I live with this, reminding me of my weakness my strength my life.
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